I'M BACK!

Alot has happened since I last posted something on my blog.  But that really shouldn't be surprising since alot of stuff usually does happen in 3years!!!!  lol.

Well we had a baby, an awesome boy.  He shall be called Jackson or "tank" as some people call him.  That will have to be a story I share some other time.

What brings me back to my blog you ask?  Well that shall be called Pinterest!!!  My second or third love, depends on if I love my husband on the day that you ask.  And that usually depends on if he remembered to take the trash out...why is that so hard?  Anyways....Pinterest.  The place where I can make all my DIY projects come true.  Right now I am working on my living room, painting and converting dark colors into light colors.  Picture will hopefully come soon and that my friends depends on when I complete said project.  With working full time, a busy toddler and a husband that is not home during the week, painting and crafting at 11pm is not ideal, but it is what I have resorted too.

Don't write me off yet....stay tuned!!

Bring The Rain

Goodness, it’s been a long week and its only Wednesday!!!! ;)

I have to share my boating story with a few of my readers. Last week Will traded his motorcycle for a boat (McKee craft 2001), in essence a fishing boat. We were really excited but a little sad to see the bike go. So to celebrate this grand thing we decided to have a picnic on an island. We figured we could spend some time alone and break in the new toy. So Sunday was the day.

Sunday started out grand! Wonderful sermon at church and beautiful day, what more could you ask for? We got out to the island about 1:30 and enjoyed our packed lunch. As we were eating, I noticed in the distance some clouds along with some rain, but it was in the distance. So we finished eating and were packing up and I looked up and said to Will "that storm is moving in REALLY quickly, what should we do?" Through some deliberation we decide to head back, not wanting to risk getting caught in it. Well, we did. It was so bad we couldn't see in front of us, rain was quickly coming into the boat and the seas were high. I just kept praying that God would steer us out. We made it to the bridge for some covering meeting 10 other boats there as well. I took off my hat and started shoveling out water. Eventually we made it back and when we got home, took a nap.

Well, I was anxious to get out on the boat again for another try at it, hoping I wasn't bad luck. I may have been wrong.

Last night............About 8:00pm, Will: I am going to take the boat out for some quick fishing. Me: Wait, I wanna go! Will: C'mon!

We get out there, beautiful night but no fish, so we decided to cruise for a bit. Then it happens, the motor just stops working. Ugh! My heart is racing as I ask Will, "What are we going to do?" He is calm, as he starts working at it, quickly goes to the trolling motor and assures me that we can get back on that it will just take awhile. Now for some that might not know, the troller motor moves at a snail speed and is hooked up to a battery. Now my concern at the time was that the battery would not get us the whole way home. We were not out too far, but you have to go around islands to get back which makes it seem longer.
During this time it was mostly quite on the boat as me and Will just prayed and had our own thoughts. We tried not to be irritated with each other, but ya know that’s hard. Then of course some of my thoughts went to "why?" And thought God was trying to use this to show us something. The only thing I came up with was, no more boat trips for me! I remember one thought in both circumstances where I was thinking, "Bring it on!" Give me your best! Bring the rain!" Sometimes when looking back we can see how we truly were strengthened in our marriage and ourselves by one event in our lives. God is just kinda cool that way.

So, it took us 4 hrs to get home. And then we didn't even make it to the dock. Will was quick to think of a place at the edge of the bridge that drops off into the water that we can get to and then walk to the truck. So we went this route. We made it home. I still don't believe that this actually happened.

Weak Moments

I don't know where else to post this because I have to get it out. I would go outside and scream it if I thought no one would think I was crazy.

I really want a baby.

Permanent Cruise Control

If only God used signs like these to direct us in the way He wants us to go. I think Will and I are in a place right now of just not knowing, which is probably a place that a lot of people find themselves in, just coasting through. Its hard to sit and write of the things that are happening in your life, especially when nothing of any consequence is happening. I have felt for some time that we are just coasting through our life and not really fulfilling any dream of God’s or ours for that matter. Like the feeling of survival took over and that is all that is left.

How do you get the want for something more back?

The Last 2 Months

So I keep feeling like we are still in the month of March. Where does time go? Time is flying by faster every year I get older especially if that year is filled with some tuff times. Its like we somehow miss out on life happening because we are focused on one specific life event. For me it was our miscarriage. March and April had a lot stuff happening in them, but seem to have flown by the fastest. Funny, I guess that is why God is always telling me to keep my eyes focused on Him. So we can appreciate our days a little more and let him worry about what the future will bring.

Speaking of future.......Will and I are busy working these days getting ready for our friends wedding in Pittsburgh on June 19. We are really excited to be a part of it and I am also excited to see that area especially where Will grew up.

We have also been busy excersing since we turned our guest bedroom into a work out room. Will has been busy with p90x and I with my ellipitcal. I am not so much enjoying this process and having to admit to ourselves that since we got married we let ourselves go a little. blah! But I want to look and feel better by my 30th bday in July, so I will keep at it!!! Hello bathing suit season, goodbye baggy hoodies, you will be missed.

~Steph

Moving on

Its been awhile since my last update, not that much hasn't happened, just didn't want to write about it, yet. I would have to say that in the month of March Will and I have been to more doctor appointments and I have more tests than I would like to think about. It has been hard since we found out that we had the miscarriage because even though it was over, it wasn't over.

The doctor had made the decision to give the body time to work things out naturally but when that didn't happen I got fustrated. I gave it as much time as I could. I will admit I wanted to move on. The hardest part for me was waking up every morning and having to remind myself that I was not pregnant and having to say it outloud so that it could sink in. I realize that I did not carry the baby that long, but it was still hard to take in.

We met with the doctor on Friday, April 10th and made the decision to do a D & C (Dilation and Curettage) since I had no bleeding and no sign of anything happening naturally. I had this done on Monday, April 13th at the Indian River Hospital.

I have had a little more pain the last couple of days but it is getting better and Will and I are moving on. I want to say a special thank you to one family member in particular, Kathleen and AJ, your words and your gift have touched our heart so much and we are so thankful to call you family, love you! Our whole family has been awesome throughout this entire situation and we couldn't have felt more love. Everyday we feel blessed even though the trial has been hard, our family reminds us that God loves us so much and is not going to let us forget it.

We look forward to the future and future good news ;)

Steph

Micah

I want to first start this blog by describing Micah and why I pick that as the title. I was sleeping the other night and was awaken for reasons unknown and decided to talk to God. I needed a name that would be fitting for a girl or boy and something that meant something. (To be explained) The name Micah was spoken to me. I thought how fitting, it really can be used for both a girl or boy, Thanks God. I immediately looked up the meaning and it means, "To Be Like God, or similar".

Micah's heart stopped sometime between March 21st and April 2nd. Micah is Will and I's first miscarrage. We know not the reasons or why God choose to take our little one and choose not to ask Him why. On the day we reach Heaven we will get to meet little Micah and will now know our little one by name.

I will share one thought of peace that God has given us thus far. All this time we have been praying for a healthy baby and we believe that Micah was just not healthy and that is the reason that God chose to take our little one so soon. We have faith that passes all understanding and rest on the shoulders of our all mighty.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

This has been a rollercoaster of a journey and unfortuantly for us, a public one. Usually with miscarriages you are able to keep them within a small group friends and family, but this is not going to be the case for us. We did choose to tell everyone at 6wks that we were pregnant and took that chance, a chance we do not regret. We do of course ask that you allow us to grieve privately. If you want to send encouragement email us at stephanie.hulings@gmail.com or shrekt3rd@yahoo.com

We are supported by two wonderful families and a wonderful group of friends. Our journey unfortuantly is not quite over yet, so we ask for prayers and thank you all for who have been praying.

Love,
Will and Steph